10/14/2010

As we are preparing to start this journey of Foster Parenting, I am pondering this: how can anyone do this without support?

My husband and I almost daily discuss another aspect of Foster Parenting, another thing to consider, another way that our lives will change when we take in our first child. There is so much that goes into Foster Parenting - love, time, money, energy, emotions, travel, relationships.

Foster Parenting, like regular parenting, requires giving and giving and giving some more, and giving some more even when you feel like you've got nothing left to give. Just as I don't know how single parents do it, I don't know how foster parents do it without support. Support from one another, friends, family, church, the fostering agency.

We have felt the support of family, friends and our church in two main ways:
1) for many months people have been praying for us. Ever since we made it public that we were pursuing foster parenting, at least a handful of closer friends from church have been praying regularly for us.
2) a few weeks ago we put a "need" out there at church - we needed more beds. Within a week we had 1 more bed. A week later I was verbally promised 2 more beds. And just days ago was told of yet another bed that we could have if we need. One elderly lady told me that she doesn't have a bed for me, but she does have a quilt she made that she'd like to give to us for the foster children.

To feel supported in these ways encourages me. We may be the ones on the "front lines" of this particular ministry, but there is support coming from those around us that is a vital part it.

I expect that we will become officially "licensed" this week. The State has 30 days to approve our license. The countdown started September 20th.

A call could come at any time. We are praying for wisdom to know how to respond.

I was DELIGHTED to read Roald Dahl's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory to my daughter this week. I loved this book as a child and vividly remember hearing one of my elementary school teachers read this beloved book to the class. My daughter definitely caught the enthusiasm too. One evening we read for 2 hours straight! Neither of us wanted to put it down!

My favorite part of this book is the inventiveness. Creativity and imagination abound in the chocolate factory.

And, being a family that lives without TV, I was singing right along with the Oompa-Loompa's as Mike Teavee was escorted out...

"So please, oh please, we beg, we pray
Go throw your TV set away
And in its place you can install
A lovely bookshelf on the wall.
Then fill the shelves with lots of books,
Ignoring all the dirty looks,
The screams and yells, the bites and kicks,
And children hitting you with sticks -
Fear not, because we promise you
That in about a week or two
Of having nothing else to do,
They'll now begin to feel the need
Of having something good to read.
And once they start - oh boy, oh boy!
You watch the slowly growing joy
That fills their hearts. They'll grow so keen
They'll wonder what they'd ever seen
In that ridiculous machine,
That nauseating, foul, unclean
Repulsive television screen!
And later, each and every kid
Will love you more for what you did."

Reading a good book together... that's just what we did! Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is a hit!

My 2-year-old son has been having trouble sleeping at night this week. Crying out. Waking up every 15 minutes or so (just as I am falling back asleep). Up to 10 times per night. It's been rough. I like the baby and toddler stage of parenting... everything except for the sleepless nights. I love sleep. Always have loved sleep. In college, I was the only person probably on the entire campus that was heading to bed before 10:00 pm! I need sleep or just can't function the next day. So, it's been a long week.

Then today I found this poem my mother had written 25-30 years ago, as she was raising her four little ones. A good reminder that this too will pass... and I will some day shed tears over the passing of these days that right now seem so rough and long.

"MOMMY"

Sleeping angels? I don't know-

Sometimes with toddlers it's hard to say so.

When they call in the night

I wake and have to fight

to get to my feet again

and plug the forgotten night light in.

Then one who needs a drink

but can't quite reach the bathroom sink.

Then someone is hot and needs his jama tops off,

and another is upset because he just can't cough.

There's one more story they forgot to tell me.

Oh, and open the curtains or they can't see.

Now he's kicked off the cover

and no one else can fix it like mother.

So many times I think the sound of my name

in the middle of the night will drive me insane.

So much I wish for the nights

I'll be able to sleep through till mornings' light.

But when I stop to think, I see

just how sad that day will be.

For when my time is completely my own,

these precious kids will no longer be home.

Sleeping angels? Oh yes they are

And if I could wish upon a star,

I'd want to be able to keep them somehow,

just the ages that they are right now.

~ LaDonna

My hubby introduced this concept to me a few months ago. It's become our preferred way for a super quick hot breakfast.

Lightly spray the inside of a coffee mug with cooking spray. Break 1 or 2 eggs into the mug.

Add a small splash of milk. Mix with a fork. Add in your favorite extras: salt, pepper, shredded cheese, hot sauce, or whatever you'd like. Microwave the mug on high for 45-60 seconds. It's done.

Eat it from the mug. Or put it on a plate with a side of toast. Or put it on a toasted bagel with a slice of ham and cheese and you've got yourself an egg-mcmuffin breakfast in approximately 2 minutes.

It works for me!

It's one of those days. Those challenging, wish-I-could-go-back-to-bed days. My head knows that I must plug away at what is before me today. My body is resisting with all its worth!

So I have a 2-step challenge before me. First, to carry on with diligence despite the fact that I'm tired. To press on and be my best for my family. To do this with a pleasant attitude will take this challenge to the second level.

Of course the surprising part is this: when you act pleasant and joyful, you will find that you truly become pleasant and joyful! Eventually you don't have to "act." I'm not there yet - at this point it's still a struggle - but I expect that a few hours from now I will find myself feeling better and being thankful that I got-up-and-did-it instead of going back to bed!

Proverbs 11:27 - He who seeks good finds goodwill, but evil comes to him who searches for it.

I'm off to look for all things good in my day today.